*sigh*

things like this take time
but this just wasn't worth it
everybody continues on with days
but i'm left alone to sulk
my mind corroding fast
due to the lack of happiness
joy i could have lived without before you
but now i'm dependent
an addict in secret
i lie to your face like nothing
because i love you
do you understand?
i hear you; you don't love me
but this is the only way
to keep us together
and i hate that i can only understand
what society tells me what is the best
so why can't i tell myself
that this is the best
your my friend and you are happy
as i am your friend
but why do i have to look for so much more
something that isn't necessary
the kisses, the hugs, and the drives of sex
all of which you hate


why can't things go perfect
why can't i just move on from you
why can't i be what you want.